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Hen Quotes and Sayings
Quotes about Hen

Please enjoy these Hen Quotes from the wise, the romantic, and the famous of the past and present.

A hen is only an egg's way of making another egg.
- Samuel Butler

Related topics: Nature

You can't set a hen in one morning and have chicken salad for lunch.
- George M. Humphrey

A Royal Commission is a broody hen sitting on a china egg.
- Michael Foot

If one cannot catch a bird of paradise,
better take a wet hen.
- Nikita Khrushchev

 

The only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen.
- Sarah Brown

If you cannot catch a bird of paradise,
better take a wet hen.
- Nikita Khrushchev

There was an old man with a beard, who said:
'It is just as I feared!
Two owls and a hen, four larks and a wren have all
built their nests in my beard.
- Edward Lear

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Gentleness doesn't get work done unless you happen to be a hen laying eggs.
- Coco Chanel

It's like the brooding hen sitting over a china egg.
- Navjot Singh Sidhu

The gentleman puts me in mind of an old hen which persists
in setting after her eggs are taken away.
- Fisher Ames

Be bold and boast, just like the cock beside the hen.
- Aeschylus

I go on working for the same reason that a hen goes on laying eggs.
- H. L. Mencken

It may be the cock that crows, but it is the hen that lays the eggs.
- Margaret Thatcher

What is sauce for the goose may be sauce for the gander
but is not necessarily sauce for the chicken,
the duck, the turkey or the guinea hen.
- Alice B. Toklas

For the Department of Energy to conduct this investigation
is like the fox watching the hen house.
- Shelley Berkley

It is said that a hundred gamecocks will live in perfect
harmony together it you do not put a hen with them;
and so it would have been with Billy and Bob,
had there been no women in the world.
- Augustus Baldwin Longstreet

It is not unprofessional to give free legal advice,
but advertising that the first visit will be free is
a bit like a fox telling chickens he will not bite
them until they cross the threshold of the hen house.
- Warren E. Burger

Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport.
- Henny Youngman

I've got all the money I'll ever need,
if I die by four o'clock.
- Henny Youngman

When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation,
he offered to touch-up my X-rays.
- Henny Youngman

She's been married so many times she has rice marks on her face.
- Henny Youngman

You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.
- Henny Youngman

When I read about the evils of drinking,
I gave up reading.
- Henny Youngman

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places.
He told me to quit going to those places.
- Henny Youngman

Do you know what it means to come home at night to
a woman who'll give you a little love,
a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house,
that's what it means.
- Henny Youngman

A Jewish woman had two chickens.
One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of
the other one to help the sick one get well.
- Henny Youngman

Why don't Jews drink? It interferes with their suffering.
- Henny Youngman

When God sneezed, I didn't know what to say.
- Henny Youngman

You have a nice personality, but not for a human being.
- Henny Youngman

That was the first time I saw a horse start from a kneeling position!
- Henny Youngman

I played a great horse yesterday!
It took seven horses to beat him.
- Henny Youngman

My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses.
Drinks right out of the bottle.
- Henny Youngman

I played a lot of tough clubs in my time.
Once a guy in one of those clubs wanted to bet me $10 that I was dead.
I was afraid to bet.
- Henny Youngman

A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student.
- Henny Youngman

How to drive a guy crazy: send him a telegram and on the top put 'page 2.'
- Henny Youngman

What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money.
- Henny Youngman

This is an elegant hotel!
Room service has an unlisted number.
- Henny Youngman

If you had your life to live over again,
do it overseas.
- Henny Youngman

I know a man who doesn't pay to have his trash taken out.
How does he get rid of his trash? He gift wraps it,
and puts in into an unlocked car.
- Henny Youngman

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
- Henny Youngman

I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years.
If my wife finds out, she'll kill me.
- Henny Youngman

You have a ready wit.
Tell me when it's ready.
- Henny Youngman

If at first you don't succeed...
so much for skydiving.
- Henny Youngman

I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up -
they have no holidays.
- Henny Youngman

My brother was a lifeguard in a car wash.
- Henny Youngman

There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night!
Finally, I let her out.
- Henny Youngman

She has a wash and wear bridal gown.
- Henny Youngman

If my mother knew I did this for a living,
she'd kill me.
She thinks I'm selling dope.
- Henny Youngman

My son complains about headaches.
I tell him all the time, when you get out of bed,
it's feet first!
- Henny Youngman

The horse I bet on was so slow, the jockey kept a diary of the trip.
- Henny Youngman

Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it.
- Henny Youngman

My dad was the town drunk.
Most of the time that's not so bad; but New York City?
- Henny Youngman

Those two are a fastidious couple.
She's fast and he's hideous.
- Henny Youngman

She's a big-hearted girl with hips to match.
- Henny Youngman

A doctor gave a man six months to live.
The man couldn't pay his bill, so he gave him another six months.
- Henny Youngman

This man used to go to school with his dog.
Then they were separated.
His dog graduated!
- Henny Youngman

My other brother-in-law died.
He was a karate expert, then joined the army.
The first time he saluted, he killed himself.
- Henny Youngman

I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.
- Henny Youngman

While playing golf today I hit two good balls.
I stepped on a rake.
- Henny Youngman

My wife dresses to kill.
She cooks the same way.
- Henny Youngman

If you're going to do something tonight that you'll
be sorry for tomorrow morning,
sleep late.
- Henny Youngman

You look like a talent scout for a cemetery.
- Henny Youngman

Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to.
- Henny Youngman

This man is frank and earnest with women.
In Fresno, he's Frank and in Chicago he's Ernest.
- Henny Youngman

Take my wife...
Please!
- Henny Youngman

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage.
We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week.
A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing.
She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.
- Henny Youngman

I live alone, with cats, books, pictures,
fresh vegetables to cook, the garden,
the hens to feed.
- Jeanette Winterson

Like blind hens, we are ignorant of our own self and the depths within us.
- Johannes Tauler

While farmers generally allow one rooster for ten hens,
ten men are scarcely sufficient to service one woman.
- Giovanni Boccaccio

I always say centered food equals centered behavior.
- Marilu Henner

We tend to connect bad food and bad habits with romance and sex.
- Marilu Henner


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