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Lake Wobegon, the little town that time forgot and
by Garrison Keillor

Lake Wobegon, the little town that time forgot and
the decades cannot improve.
- Garrison Keillor

Nothing you do for a child is ever wasted.
- Garrison Keillor PHOTO

Anyone who thinks sitting in church
can make you a Christian must also think
that sitting in a garage can make you a car.
- Garrison Keillor

Thank you, God, for this good life
and forgive us if we do not love it enough.
- Garrison Keillor

 

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose.
- Garrison Keillor

I think the most un-American thing you can say is,
'You can't say that.'
- Garrison Keillor

A minister has to be able to read a clock.
At noon, it's time to go home and turn up the pot roast
and get the peas out of the freezer.
- Garrison Keillor

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I want to resume the life of a shy person.
- Garrison Keillor

God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is,
he's stuck with so many bad actors
who don't know how to play funny.
- Garrison Keillor

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory,
like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.
- Garrison Keillor

Vodka is tasteless going down, but it is memorable coming up.
- Garrison Keillor

They say such nice things about people at their funerals
that it makes me sad that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.
- Garrison Keillor

The funniest line in English is "Get it?" When you say that,
everyone chortles.
- Garrison Keillor

I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.
- Garrison Keillor

Welcome to Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong,
all the men are good-looking, and all the children are above average.
- Garrison Keillor

It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire.
With air conditioning their windows were shut,
they couldn't hear the barbarians coming.
- Garrison Keillor

I'm not busy...
a woman with three children under the age of 10 wouldn't
think my schedule looked so busy.
- Garrison Keillor

A good newspaper is never nearly good enough but a
lousy newspaper is a joy forever.
- Garrison Keillor

A book is a gift you can open again and again.
- Garrison Keillor

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother
laugh so hard that food came out of his nose.
- Garrison Keillor

A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table -
There's nothing wrong with them,
but it's hard to stop thinking about it.
- Garrison Keillor

Nothing you do for children is ever wasted.
They seem not to notice us, hovering,
averting our eyes, and they seldom offer thanks,
but what we do for them is never wasted.
- Garrison Keillor

Sometimes you have to look reality in the eye,
and deny it.
- Garrison Keillor

Even in a time of elephantine vanity and greed,
one never has to look far to see the campfires of gentle people.
- Garrison Keillor

It's a shallow life that doesn't give a person a few scars.
- Garrison Keillor

Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you
wanted but getting what you have,
which once you have got it you may be smart enough
to see is what you would have wanted had you known.
- Garrison Keillor

We have nearly complete misunderstanding between
people of different faiths in Lake Wobegon,
and that's probably one reason why we get along so very well.
It's when you are trying to convince another person to think
the same way that you do that there is
friction and trouble between people.
But when you feel that the other person is
dumber than dirt, too dumb for words -
why waste your breath - you get along pretty well.
There's no bond between people that's quite so strong as
when people each feel slightly superior towards the other one.
- Garrison Keillor

Talk not of the river or lake
To those who have looked on the sea.
- Ella Wheeler Wilcox

Perhaps the truth depends on a walk around the lake.
- Wallace Stevens

The lake and the mountains have become my landscape,
my real world.
- Georges Simenon

Nothing is more memorable than a smell.
One scent can be unexpected, momentary and fleeting,
yet conjure up a childhood summer beside a lake in the mountains.
- Diane Ackerman

During the Tertiary period the whole valley of Mexico was one great lake.
- Edward Burnett Tylor

I want to express my deepest apology to the athletes,
the people of Salt Lake City in Utah and the millions
of citizens worldwide who love and respect the games.
- Juan Antonio Samaranch

Drop guilt! - because to be guilty is to live in hell.
Not being guilty, you will have the freshness
of dewdrops in the early morning sun,
you will have the freshness of lotus petals in the lake,
you will have the freshness of the stars in the night.
Once guilt disappears you will have
a totally different kind of life, luminous and radiant.
You will have a dance to your feet
and your heart will be singing a thousand and one songs.
- Osho

I'm an old-fashioned guy...
I want to be an old man with a beer belly sitting on a porch,
looking at a lake or something.
- Johnny Depp

The truth is, I can never die.
For I will be in everything and see you in everything and watch over you.
I am your reaction in the water of a mountain lake.
- Klaus Kinski

I left Montana in Spring of 1866, for Utah,
arriving at Salt Lake city during the summer.
- Calamity Jane

Many drops make a bucket, many buckets make a pond,
many ponds make a lake, and many lakes make an ocean.
- Percy Ross

Many miles away there's a shadow on the door of a cottage
on the Shore of a dark Scottish lake.
- Walter Scott

I planned to stop in 2002 after the Salt Lake City Olympics.
I felt able to remain competitive another four years,
and I wanted to stop while I'm still at the top.
- Hermann Maier

It was necessary to organize my career to remain at
the top level until Salt Lake City.
- Hermann Maier

Yesterday the flame of the Olympic torch was carried
through our great state on its way to Salt Lake City.
- Jane D. Hull

I'd like to know about some of the things that they teach down there,
like building a lake.
If I ever wanted to build a lake, I'd like to know how to do it.
- Tom Felton

My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took
her out in the lake and threw her off the boat.
I said, 'Mom, they weren't trying to teach you how to swim.'
- Paula Poundstone

The seaweed is always greener in somebody else's lake.
- the movie The Little Mermaid (1989)

Whether or not we can save Lake Michigan,
whether or not we can avoid a breakdown in our criminal
justice system are more important than whether or not
I'm going to be governor.
- Bill Scott

One of the chiefs of this nation, with his young men,
escorted us to the Lake of the Illinois.
- Jacques Marquette

When I sell liquor, it's called bootlegging;
when my patrons serve it on Lake Shore Drive,
it's called hospitality.
- Al Capone

When I was a kid a growing up in Ontario,
Canada, Lake Erie was so polluted, I never thought it would ever,
EVER be turned around where they could start cleaning it out in my lifetime!
- Rick Danko

I am personally saddened and stunned by the tragic
events that took place in Red Lake.
- Collin C. Peterson

We just bought this house.
It's too big.
It's like 400,000 square feet, or something.
We got an indoor lake and ski slope in the house!
It's just too big.
- Adam Sandler

Marriage may often be a stormy lake,
but celibacy is almost always a muddy horse pond.
- Thomas Love Peacock

I think it requires a bit of honesty,
Swan Lake.
- Graeme Murphy

Capo, my first golden retriever, so loved to swim she
once jumped off a cliff to get into Lake Superior.
- Sara Paretsky

I have a home in Salt Lake, and I have a home in Malibu,
at the beach.
- Roma Downey

The lake at Neverland is right in the very front,
and you just want to dive in.
- Rick Dees

My favorite country is America.
I love going there!
I go in the local lake near where I work on Sundays.
It's called Berry Hill.
- Tom Felton

I was born on Wellington Avenue and my family that
remains lives in the Lake Shore Drive area.
- Bob Balaban

What's the difference between tough love and acting like a jerk?
- Ricki Lake

The greatest music is made for love,
not for money.
- Greg Lake

The enormous lake stretched flat and smooth and white
all the way to the edge of the gray sky.
Wagon tracks went away across it, so far that you could not see where they went;
they ended in nothing at all.
- Laura Ingalls Wilder

You could put all the talent I had into your left eye
and still not suffer from impaired vision.
- Veronica Lake

We went to a small lake, Bass Lake.
It was beautiful.
It was perfectly still when we got there in the morning.
The fog was lifting off the water.
It was just magical.
And we did catch some fish, 13 fish.
- Jennifer Granholm

I have had so many great moments, but I would have
to say that dancing the Swan in 'Swan Lake' was such
a unique and passionate experience for me.
It was such bloody hard work, even at that very early age,
that I would not want to try to replicate it again now.
- William Kempe

Making a comeback is one of the most difficult things to do with dignity.
- Greg Lake

Philosophically, what I have learned is to thy own self be true.
That is the biggest lesson of all.
Relax; music is fun.
To many people take it to seriously because of the money involved.
- Greg Lake

I would like to involve myself in some black music.
I would like to do some blues and some gospel music.
I want to try stuff from other genres and try to widen my musical base.
- Greg Lake

I don't think art is a goal orientated business.
I don't do things for the challenges,
I only do them because I love them, I'm not really a goal orientated,
achiever type of person.
- Greg Lake

It was night and I could see a large and calm lake,
reflecting the moon.
Black mountains rose around it.
I arrived from between two of these mountains,
I looked at the lake and the moon, and that was it,
nothing else happened.
- Georges Simenon

I wasn't a sex symbol, I was a sex zombie.
- Veronica Lake

Unless you go forward then you are going back.
- Greg Lake


Thank you for visiting: Lake Wobegon, the little town that time forgot and by Garrison Keillor.

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