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Cats are intended to teach us that not everything ...
by Garrison Keillor

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose.
- Garrison Keillor

Related topics: Pet

Nothing you do for a child is ever wasted.
- Garrison Keillor PHOTO

Anyone who thinks sitting in church
can make you a Christian must also think
that sitting in a garage can make you a car.
- Garrison Keillor

Thank you, God, for this good life
and forgive us if we do not love it enough.
- Garrison Keillor

 

Nothing you do for children is ever wasted.
They seem not to notice us, hovering,
averting our eyes, and they seldom offer thanks,
but what we do for them is never wasted.
- Garrison Keillor

They say such nice things about people at their funerals
that it makes me sad that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.
- Garrison Keillor

Vodka is tasteless going down, but it is memorable coming up.
- Garrison Keillor

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It's a shallow life that doesn't give a person a few scars.
- Garrison Keillor

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother
laugh so hard that food came out of his nose.
- Garrison Keillor

A book is a gift you can open again and again.
- Garrison Keillor

The funniest line in English is "Get it?" When you say that,
everyone chortles.
- Garrison Keillor

Sometimes you have to look reality in the eye,
and deny it.
- Garrison Keillor

Even in a time of elephantine vanity and greed,
one never has to look far to see the campfires of gentle people.
- Garrison Keillor

I want to resume the life of a shy person.
- Garrison Keillor

I'm not busy...
a woman with three children under the age of 10 wouldn't
think my schedule looked so busy.
- Garrison Keillor

Lake Wobegon, the little town that time forgot and
the decades cannot improve.
- Garrison Keillor

Welcome to Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong,
all the men are good-looking, and all the children are above average.
- Garrison Keillor

I think the most un-American thing you can say is,
'You can't say that.'
- Garrison Keillor

A minister has to be able to read a clock.
At noon, it's time to go home and turn up the pot roast
and get the peas out of the freezer.
- Garrison Keillor

A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table -
There's nothing wrong with them,
but it's hard to stop thinking about it.
- Garrison Keillor

I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.
- Garrison Keillor

A good newspaper is never nearly good enough but a
lousy newspaper is a joy forever.
- Garrison Keillor

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory,
like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.
- Garrison Keillor

It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire.
With air conditioning their windows were shut,
they couldn't hear the barbarians coming.
- Garrison Keillor

God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is,
he's stuck with so many bad actors
who don't know how to play funny.
- Garrison Keillor

Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you
wanted but getting what you have,
which once you have got it you may be smart enough
to see is what you would have wanted had you known.
- Garrison Keillor

We have nearly complete misunderstanding between
people of different faiths in Lake Wobegon,
and that's probably one reason why we get along so very well.
It's when you are trying to convince another person to think
the same way that you do that there is
friction and trouble between people.
But when you feel that the other person is
dumber than dirt, too dumb for words -
why waste your breath - you get along pretty well.
There's no bond between people that's quite so strong as
when people each feel slightly superior towards the other one.
- Garrison Keillor

I am fond of pigs.
Dogs look up to us.
Cats look down on us.
Pigs treat us as equals.
- Winston Churchill

My wife and I have so much fun when we travel and find anything...
like stray cats and squirrels.
- Eric Roberts

Just watching my cats can make me happy.
- Paula Cole

Cats know how to obtain food without labor,
shelter without confinement, and love without penalties.
- W. L. George

I have studied many philosophers and many cats.
The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior.
- Hippolyte Taine

I love cats because I enjoy my home;
and little by little,
they become its visible soul.
- Jean Cocteau

Like all pure creatures, cats are practical.
- William S. Burroughs

Many cats are the death of the mouse.
- Kaspar Hauser

I've always been mad about cats.
- Vivien Leigh

Cats are inquisitive, but hate to admit it.
- Mason Cooley

I live alone, with cats, books, pictures,
fresh vegetables to cook, the garden,
the hens to feed.
- Jeanette Winterson

I have felt cats rubbing their faces against mine and
touching my cheek with claws carefully sheathed.
These things, to me, are expressions of love.
- James Herriot

A happy arrangement: many people prefer cats to other people,
and many cats prefer people to other cats.
- Mason Cooley

Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does
any harm to ask for what you want.
- Joseph Wood Krutch

Cats are connoisseurs of comfort.
- James Herriot

I believe cats to be spirits come to earth.
A cat, I am sure, could walk on a cloud without coming through.
- Jules Verne

Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject
to a good many different ailments,
but I have never heard of one who suffered from insomnia.
- Joseph Wood Krutch

Cats have it all - admiration, an endless sleep,
and company only when they want it.
- Rod McKuen

I take care of my flowers and my cats.
And enjoy food.
And that's living.
- Ursula Andress

It is impossible for a lover of cats to banish these alert,
gentle, and discriminating friends, who give us just
enough of their regard and complaisance to make us hunger for more.
- Agnes Repplier

I love cats.
- Dick Van Patten

Women and cats will do as they please,
and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Perhaps it is because cats do not live by human patterns,
do not fit themselves into prescribed behavior,
that they are so united to creative people.
- Andre Norton

We have three cats.
It's like having children, but there is no tuition involved.
- Ron Reagan

Showing cats is addictive.
All you need is one rosette and you're hooked.
- Donna Andrews

If cats were double the size they are now,
they'd probably be illegal.
- Doug Coupland

As anyone who has ever been around a cat for any length of time well knows,
cats have enormous patience with the limitations of the human kind.
- Cleveland Amory

Way down deep, we're all motivated by the same urges.
Cats have the courage to live by them.
- Jim Davis

I used to love dogs until I discovered cats.
- Nafisa Joseph

Time spent with cats is never wasted.
- Sigmund Freud

There are two means of refuge
from the miseries of life:
music and cats.
- Albert Schweitzer

I had been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult.
It's not.
Mine had me trained in two days.
- Bill Dana

The problem with cats is that they get the exact same
look on their face whether they see a moth or an axe-murderer.
- Paula Poundstone

Cats don't like change without their consent.
- Roger Caras

Sleeping together is a euphemism for people,
but tantamount to marriage with cats.
- Marge Piercy

People with insufficient personalities are fond of cats.
These people adore being ignored.
- Henry Morgan

We were brash young fellows'.
I was always hanging with the older crowd anyway.
The musicians were the Hip Cats, and I was hanging with them anyway.
I Just started out real early.
- Bootsy Collins

Actually, I don't hate cats, I'm just kind of afraid of them.
- Clay Aiken

No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln

My quest these days is to find my long lost inner child,
but I'm afraid if I do, I'll end up with food in my
hair and way too in love with the cats.
- Kenny Loggins

I did have a dog for a few years when I was little,
but then just really had cats until I was about 21.
- Eric Roberts

In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods;
they have not forgotten this.
- Terry Pratchett

My hobbies are cooking and gardening,
especially growing orchids.
I love soccer, my husband and I support a British team called Chelsea,
and I also enjoy tennis.
We have 3 cats.
- Juliet Mills

As long as I'm around the cats in the hip hop scene,
they'll throw me a track and I'll write a rap over it.
- Ice T


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