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Don't believe in miracles - depend on them. ...
by Laurence J. Peter

Don't believe in miracles - depend on them.
- Laurence J. Peter

Speak when you are angry -
and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.
- Laurence J. Peter PHOTO

There are two kinds of failures:
those who thought and never did,
and those who did and never thought.
- Laurence J. Peter

Facts are stubborn things,
but statistics are more pliable.
- Laurence J. Peter

 

Work is accomplished by those employees who have not
yet reached their level of incompetence.
- Laurence J. Peter

An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why
the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.
- Laurence J. Peter

You can always tell a real friend: when you've made
a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.
- Laurence J. Peter

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Heredity is what sets the parents of a teenager wondering about each other.
- Laurence J. Peter

Expert: a man who makes three correct guesses consecutively.
- Laurence J. Peter

The best intelligence test is what we do with our leisure.
- Laurence J. Peter

Going to church doesn't make you any more a Christian
than going to the garage makes you a car.
- Laurence J. Peter

You can't cross the sea merely by standing and staring at the water.
Don't let yourself indulge in vain wishes.
- Laurence J. Peter

In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence.
- Laurence J. Peter

Every girl should use what Mother Nature gave her before
Father Time takes it away.
- Laurence J. Peter

Slump, and the world slumps with you.
Push, and you push alone.
- Laurence J. Peter

As a matter of fact is an expression that precedes
many an expression that isn't.
- Laurence J. Peter

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
- Laurence J. Peter

Originality is the fine art of remembering what you
hear but forgetting where you heard it.
- Laurence J. Peter

Fortune knocks but once, but misfortune has much more patience.
- Laurence J. Peter

There are two kinds of egotists: Those who admit it,
and the rest of us.
- Laurence J. Peter

It's better to have loved and lost than to have to
do forty pounds of laundry a week.
- Laurence J. Peter

An intelligence test sometimes shows a man how smart
he would have been not to have taken it.
- Laurence J. Peter

Education is a method whereby
one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.
- Laurence J. Peter

Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing
our parents' shortcomings.
- Laurence J. Peter

A man convinced against his will is not convinced.
- Laurence J. Peter

The seaman tells stories of winds, the ploughman of bulls;
the soldier details his wounds,
the shepherd his sheep.
- Laurence J. Peter

Some problems are so complex that you have to be highly
intelligent and well informed just to be undecided about them.
- Laurence J. Peter

Nobody can be perfect unless he admits his faults,
but if he has faults how can he be perfect?
- Laurence J. Peter

Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.
- Laurence J. Peter

Bureaucracy defends the status quo long past the time
when the quo has lost its status.
- Laurence J. Peter

When in doubt or danger, run in circles,
scream and shout.
- Laurence J. Peter

Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell,
and advertise.
- Laurence J. Peter

A man doesn't know what he knows until he knows what he doesn't know.
- Laurence J. Peter

Committees have become so important nowadays that subcommittees
have to be appointed to do the work.
- Laurence J. Peter

Make three correct guesses consecutively and you will
establish a reputation as an expert.
- Laurence J. Peter

A pessimist is a man who looks both ways when he crosses the street.
- Laurence J. Peter

America is a land of taxation that was founded to avoid taxation.
- Laurence J. Peter

A censor is an expert in cutting remarks.
A censor is a man who knows more than he thinks you ought to.
- Laurence J. Peter

The great question is not whether you have failed,
but whether you are content with failure.
- Laurence J. Peter

Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.
- Laurence J. Peter

America is a country that doesn't know where it is
going but is determined to set a speed record getting there.
- Laurence J. Peter

If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind,
what is the significance of a clean desk?
- Laurence J. Peter

Everyone rises to their level of incompetence.
- Laurence J. Peter

Men now monopolize the upper levels...
depriving women of their rightful share of opportunities for incompetence.
- Laurence J. Peter

Competence, like truth, beauty, and contact lenses,
is in the eye of the beholder.
- Laurence J. Peter

The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway
is usually a poor judge of distance.
- Laurence J. Peter

If you don't know where you're going,
you will probably end up somewhere else.
- Laurence J. Peter

Television has changed the American child from an irresistable
force to an immovable object.
- Laurence J. Peter

Democracy is a process by which people are free to
choose the man who will get the blame.
- Laurence J. Peter

The future belongs to those
who believe in the beauty of their dreams.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Believe nothing, no matter where you read it,
or who said it, no matter if I have said it,
unless it agrees with your own reason
and your own common sense.
- The Buddha

Those who believe they can do something
and those who believe they can't
are both right.
- Henry Ford

I believe that everything happens for a reason.
People change so that you can learn to let go,
things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right,
you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself,
and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.
- Marilyn Monroe

Whatever you do, you need courage.
Whatever course you decide upon,
there is always someone to tell you
that you are wrong.
There are always difficulties arising
that tempt you to believe your critics are right.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Truth is not defined by
how many people believe something.
Ask. Question. Think.
Decide - for yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Trust your own inner guidance.
Have faith that your steps are
carrying you toward your dreams.
Keep your eyes on the heavens
and believe that your feet will carry you well.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Never believe that a few caring people can't change the world.
For, indeed, that's all who ever have.
- Margaret Mead

Stand often in the company of dreamers.
They believe you can achieve impossible things.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

This is my wish for you:
Comfort on difficult days,
Smiles when sadness intrudes,
Rainbows to follow the clouds,
Laughter to kiss your lips,
Sunsets to warm your heart,
Hugs when spirits sag,
Beauty for your eyes to see,
Friendships to brighten your being,
Faith so that you can believe,
Confidence for when you doubt,
Courage to know yourself,
Patience to accept the truth,
Love to complete your life.
- Anonymous

Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations.
I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty,
believe in them, and try to follow where they lead.
- Louisa May Alcott

I believe that a simple and unassuming manner of life
is best for everyone, best both for the body and the mind.
- Albert Einstein

We believe whatever we want to believe.
- Demosthenes

I, with a deeper instinct,
choose a man who compels my strength,
who makes enormous demands on me,
who does not doubt my courage or my toughness,
who does not believe me naive or innocent,
who has the courage to treat me like a woman.
- Anais Nin

Everything we believe is a matter of evolution and history.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I don't believe people are looking for the meaning of life
as much as they are looking for the experience of being alive.
- Joseph Campbell

I no doubt deserved my enemies,
but I don't believe I deserved my friends.
- Walt Whitman

Man prefers to believe what he prefers to be true.
- Francis Bacon

I used to believe in forever, but forever's too good to be true.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

A true friend is one who believes in you
when you have ceased to believe in yourself.
- Anonymous

The moment we want to believe something,
we suddenly see all the arguments for it,
and become blind to the arguments against it.
- George Bernard Shaw

What people believe prevails over the truth.
- Sophocles


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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