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Garrison Keillor Quotes and Sayings
Quotes by Garrison Keillor

I hope you like this page of quotes by Garrison Keillor from my extensive collection of relationship quotes.

Nothing you do for a child is ever wasted.
- Garrison Keillor

Related topics: Values Family Relationship

Anyone who thinks sitting in church
can make you a Christian must also think
that sitting in a garage can make you a car.
- Garrison Keillor

Thank you, God, for this good life
and forgive us if we do not love it enough.
- Garrison Keillor

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose.
- Garrison Keillor

 

They say such nice things about people at their funerals
that it makes me sad that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.
- Garrison Keillor

Lake Wobegon, the little town that time forgot and
the decades cannot improve.
- Garrison Keillor

Even in a time of elephantine vanity and greed,
one never has to look far to see the campfires of gentle people.
- Garrison Keillor

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The highlight of my childhood was making my brother
laugh so hard that food came out of his nose.
- Garrison Keillor

Nothing you do for children is ever wasted.
They seem not to notice us, hovering,
averting our eyes, and they seldom offer thanks,
but what we do for them is never wasted.
- Garrison Keillor

I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.
- Garrison Keillor

I want to resume the life of a shy person.
- Garrison Keillor

It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire.
With air conditioning their windows were shut,
they couldn't hear the barbarians coming.
- Garrison Keillor

A book is a gift you can open again and again.
- Garrison Keillor

God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is,
he's stuck with so many bad actors
who don't know how to play funny.
- Garrison Keillor

A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table -
There's nothing wrong with them,
but it's hard to stop thinking about it.
- Garrison Keillor

A minister has to be able to read a clock.
At noon, it's time to go home and turn up the pot roast
and get the peas out of the freezer.
- Garrison Keillor

Sometimes you have to look reality in the eye,
and deny it.
- Garrison Keillor

The funniest line in English is "Get it?" When you say that,
everyone chortles.
- Garrison Keillor

I think the most un-American thing you can say is,
'You can't say that.'
- Garrison Keillor

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory,
like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.
- Garrison Keillor

It's a shallow life that doesn't give a person a few scars.
- Garrison Keillor

Vodka is tasteless going down, but it is memorable coming up.
- Garrison Keillor

I'm not busy...
a woman with three children under the age of 10 wouldn't
think my schedule looked so busy.
- Garrison Keillor

Welcome to Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong,
all the men are good-looking, and all the children are above average.
- Garrison Keillor

A good newspaper is never nearly good enough but a
lousy newspaper is a joy forever.
- Garrison Keillor

Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you
wanted but getting what you have,
which once you have got it you may be smart enough
to see is what you would have wanted had you known.
- Garrison Keillor

We have nearly complete misunderstanding between
people of different faiths in Lake Wobegon,
and that's probably one reason why we get along so very well.
It's when you are trying to convince another person to think
the same way that you do that there is
friction and trouble between people.
But when you feel that the other person is
dumber than dirt, too dumb for words -
why waste your breath - you get along pretty well.
There's no bond between people that's quite so strong as
when people each feel slightly superior towards the other one.
- Garrison Keillor

The only thing necessary for evil to triumph
is for enough good men to do nothing.
- Edmund Burke PHOTO

I say NO to the demands of the world.
I say YES to the longings of my own heart.
There is nothing I ever need to have.
There is nothing I ever need to do.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie PHOTO

Believe nothing, no matter where you read it,
or who said it, no matter if I have said it,
unless it agrees with your own reason
and your own common sense.
- The Buddha

There are only two ways to live your life.
One is as though nothing is a miracle.
The other is as though everything is a miracle.
- Albert Einstein

Don't Take Anything Personally.
Nothing others do is because of you.
- Miguel Angel Ruiz (don Miguel Ruiz)

Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.
- Helen Keller

Where There is Love, Nothing is Missing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Choose Inner Peace.
Nothing is worth losing your inner peace.
Take action as circumstances require,
but never surrender your inner peace.
Stop. Breathe deeply.
Close your eyes and breathe deeply again.
Then, and only then, take action -
from a peaceful heart.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Trust in the Light.
Darkness is not a force -
it is merely the absence of light.
Observe that when a light is brought to a dark place,
the darkness disappears.
Sadness is similar -
when joy is brought to suffering,
the sadness disappears.
Open yourself to the Light!
Hold back nothing,
Trust in the Light.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There is nothing I ever need to have.
There is nothing I ever need to do.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Nothing is softer or more flexible than water,
yet nothing can resist it.
- Lao Tzu

Nothing in life is to be feared.
It is only to be understood.
- Marie Curie

There is nothing either good or bad,
but thinking makes it so.
- William Shakespeare

Don't underestimate the value of Doing Nothing,
of just going along,
listening to all the things you can't hear,
and not bothering.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Love is an endless mystery,
for it has nothing else to explain it.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Fully experience THIS moment -
breathe in, breathe out - nothing more.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Where There is Love,
Nothing is Missing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There is nothing in a caterpillar that tells you
it's going to be a butterfly.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

"Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare,
The lone and level sands stretch far away.
- Percy Bysshe Shelley

Nothing can bring a real sense of security
into the home except true love.
- Billy Graham

Nothing I've ever done has given me more joys and rewards
than being a father to my children.
- Bill Cosby

Every good relationship, especially marriage, is based on respect.
If it's not based on respect,
nothing that appears to be good will last very long.
- Amy Grant

Our ordinary mind always tries to persuade us
that we are nothing but acorns
and that our greatest happiness will be
to become bigger, fatter, shinier acorns;
but that is of interest only to pigs.
Our faith gives us knowledge of something better:
that we can become oak trees.
- E. F. Schumacher

People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Nothing others do is because of you.
What others say and do is a projection of their own reality.
- don Miguel Ruiz

Nothing is so firmly believed as what is least known.
- Michel de Montaigne

Nothing is so common-place as to wish to be remarkable.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

Know that where there is love, nothing is missing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Nothing other people do is because of you.
It is because of themselves
- don Miguel Ruiz

Nothing is more despicable than respect based on fear.
- Albert Camus

I always like to know everything about my new friends,
and nothing about my old ones.
- Oscar Wilde

Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore,
and that's what parents were created for.
- Ogden Nash

The heart knows nothing of the past,
nothing of the future;
it knows only of the present.
- Osho

Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.
Security is mostly a superstition.
It does not exist in nature.
- Helen Keller

I was born on the prairies where the wind blew free
and there was nothing to break the light of the sun.
I was born where there were no enclosures.
- Geronimo

If anyone is unhappy, remember that
his unhappiness is his own fault...
Nothing else is the cause of anxiety or loss of tranquility
except our own opinion.
- Epictetus

Stress is nothing more than a
socially acceptable form of mental illness.
- Richard Carlson

Regrets and resentments cause great suffering but fix nothing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Money has never made man happy, nor will it,
there is nothing in its nature to produce happiness.
The more of it one has the more one wants.
- Benjamin Franklin

The world is a dangerous place,
not because of those who do evil,
but because of those who look on and do nothing.
- Albert Einstein

Nothing astonishes men so much as common sense and plain dealing.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"To know" is to know that you know nothing.
That is the meaning of true knowledge.
- Confucius

There is nothing to do.
There is nothing to say.
There is nothing to think.
There is nothing to feel.
The River of Life just flows.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

To live a pure unselfish life,
one must count nothing as one's own
in the midst of abundance.
- The Buddha


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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